Why you should analyze your relationships in a structured way

When talking about life improvement, we usually talk about time management, efficient work and health issues. Relationships are barely mentioned, despite playing a fundamental role in happiness and wellbeing.

Frida Kahlo and her husband, Diego Rivera

Frida Kahlo and her husband, Diego Rivera

Analyzing them in a practical and structured way, by recognizing patterns and flaws and by rationally deciding which actions are needed in order to make changes (like calling your mom once a week), rather than an “emotionless” approach to something that is highly connected to emotions, is an act of love and care.

Beware, though, of planning actions according to your personality and routine – do not commit yourself to distribute hugs, for example, if you feel totally awkward upon body contact. As in any habit change or acquisition, start small, one habit at a time, and focus on the most important things first. You should definitely get a bit out of your comfort zone and invest in new behaviors, but remember to change gradually or you might feel “false” and uncomfortable, the opposite of what you want to feel in a close and nurturing relationship.

Remember the actions are about your behavior, but must be planned with the other person in mind: despite your love for surprises, is your friend OK in receiving unannounced visits? Find the balance between comfort and behaviors that cause effective changes, and enjoy the benefits of caring relationships.

Do you think of your relationships in a rational way? How do you plan actions towards better relationships? Comment!

Please remember that English is not my first language, so I apologize for any mistakes or weird word arrangements. Help me improve by sending an email or commenting if you find anything wrong or bad-sounding!

4 responses to “Why you should analyze your relationships in a structured way

  1. I like the way you think. I’ll continue to read your posts with interest.

    Liked by 1 person

    • Indeed! It is so difficult to think rationally when we are emotionally distressed, but we should keep trying.


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