You should date yourself. Some solitude is fundamental for self-development. Meditation is fantastic, but a lot of people are afraid of sitting still, alone, in silence. Sounds scary.
So, if you are not into meditating (yet), try to have some quality time alone.
Resting on the vine, by Carl Spitzweg, 1845.
Go to a cafe, sit down and don’t pick your phone for the entire cup of coffee. Just be there, with your thoughts. People watch. Make a comparison. Mock someone in silence. Laugh with your eyes. See, you are a good companion.
Take a bath with yourself. Put a nice song, light candles and incense. Don’t allow company besides observing cats. Look at yourself being you. Get to know yourself. Acknowledge your thoughts. Categorize them. Acknowledge your feelings. Categorize them. Get to conclusions. Get anxious. Analyze it. Learn with the patterns.
You have a lot to learn with yourself, but it takes time. Make the time.
How spending time alone improves your life? Please comment!
Please remember that English is not my first language, so I apologize for any mistakes or weird word arrangements. Help me improve by sending an email to contacthoneyteaatgmaildotcom or commenting if you find anything wrong or bad-sounding!
Spending time alone allows you to understand who you are. When you understand this, you are better able to love yourself and then you are finally able to love someone else.
For me, so far, in my journey of selflove and discovery, it’s been scary, but I’ve gotten to know and realize what I neglect in relationships.
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It is indeed scary, as anything unknown, but delightful as well. We, humans, are very interesting beings.
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writing is a solitary experience but I’m never alone. I’ve got a head full of life. Cheers Opher
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If you haven’t already, read Love After Love by Derek Walcott. So similar to your lovely post x
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I haven’t, but I certainly will. Thanks so much for your words.
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Love your post 🙂 For my self has been meditation, like you first stated. Even though I am still a beginner , I have noticed a huge improvement in my quality if life.
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Reblogged this on ahhha moment and commented:
Sometimes you are the most important and it is such a bliss to see how good you feel when you are taking care of yourself.
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It is really good to spend a while alone, purely being yourself with no one else to accommodate or reflect. You can spend much time being independently content, at peace, or full of energy. There are entire universes of thought and ideas inside each person, wild and mesmerizing, and we tend to search for them in other people whilst forgetting or neglecting those inside ourselves.
Lonely is not the same thing as alone.
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You are right. There is a whole universe within, waiting to be unfolded. We should spend more time exploring it – understanding what happens within helps us to live better with what’s outside. Thanks so much for commenting.
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I love your phrase, “Look at yourself being you.” I think it goes to the heart of vipassana meditation — seeing clearly how it is to just be.
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It is no easy thing to do, right? Thanks a lot for commenting.
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This is lovely, and your language is not only economical, but engaging. Well done (say I and my observing cats) :))!
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Thanks so much for your kind words – so happy to hear that 🙂
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Really good! Self Love is the best form of love. We always look on the outside to give us fulfillment or happiness without realizing that it is our insides first whom we have to befriend. Good going!
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Thanks a lot – so glad you liked it 🙂
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